there's weird feminine value in being unobtainable.
if you sleep with a man, they outvalue you, and so people defer to them as being in charge of you. but they're not - you're in charge of you. so you don't sleep with men so you don't have to correct fools.
at least, you don't sleep with men that they know about. you find your conquests invisibly. and maintain an illusion of unobtainability. because being obtainable is bad.
I should probably stop.
I actually think this is probably like coming out - it's probably better to just rip the bandaid off, have the confrontations that need to be had, and move on with life
so... in this case, that would be "have a very public affair and put anyone that needs correcting in their place when they say something about it"
but I'm still so obsessed with invisible status points that I need to maintain closeted untouchable unfuckable-ness I guess
I'm a tactile person
one of my love languages is touch
one of my best friends was recently like "it would be weird to hug maenad, they have this untouchable aura" and I'm
completely at a loss for how to correct that besides mauling their cat when I need affection
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