@shoutcacophony I see a similar sort of miscommunication occur when people try to train dogs - I often see a behavior where they yell at them under the assumption that the dog can read their minds and intuit what they did wrong. Actual successful trainers understand that behaviors need to be broken down in to the steps the dog can understand.

So frustrating.

@ultimape

OK, erm :)

First thing: is there a subtext here? (Asking)

I agree overall, though and have thoughts in general as well

@shoutcacophony No subtext, but one of my obsessions is learning theory, training and education. So I know a lot about dog training. Its mostly just the lens I use to understand it.

Looking thru they didn't mention shame, but I interpreted the passage “you’re smart enough to find friends to sit with at lunch, why can’t you figure out how to solve this linear equation yourself?” as example social shaming ritual. Perhaps a subtext I picked up on?

@ultimape shaming and/or actual confusion in my experience. sometimes mixed with anger

@shoutcacophony yeah. Anger thing even happens with what I see with dog owners - they will get increasingly angry when the dog doesn't "obey".

I can't help but think many of my own negative social experiences are like that - people expecting me to have that intuition effect. When I run into it, like the dogs, it feels like they want me to read their minds. If I don't i'm 'disobedient' or rude, or "not trying hard enough" like that article emphasizes.